Tuesday, August 9, 2011

18 random thoughts about internet marketing


Chili? Really?
Bonus tip: Learning the difference between "Chile" and "Chili" is really helpful.

A little semi-random Wednesday thinking:

  1. Always ready our analytics reports. Understand them. Demand that someone make you understand them. Making business decisions without that knowledge will probably kill your company.
  2. Never buy a product with ‘Crusher’, ‘Disintegrator’ or ‘Miracle’ in the name. Anything invoking the elements, one god or another, or faster-than-light travel is also very likely bad.
  3. If someone calls themselves a ‘guru’, be suspicious. Same with ‘rockstar’. Aaron Kronis, one of my staff, gets a pass on this. He calls himself ‘SEO Rockstar’, but that’s because he really is a rockstar. He plays guitar.
  4. If a marketer opens his web site or proposal with a phrase like “In a world…” or “In the blink of an eye…” they’re a tool.
  5. Traditional agencies that try to move into internet marketing fail. They don’t just fail in a “oops” kind of way. They fail in a “Obi Wan just sliced off my arms and legs and left me cooking slowly next to a lava flow, only this time the Emperor isn’t coming to help me” kind of way.
  6. Internet marketing agencies that try to move into traditional marketing fail equally horrifically.
  7. You get what you pay for, not what you wish for.
  8. Your level of success is directly proportional to your level of cooperation.
  9. Your level of success is logarithmically proportional to your agency’s level of expertise.
  10. If you get ripped off, it’s partly your fault. You’re the one who ignored every sign that the guy charging 80% less was a fraud. You ignored the fact that the social media expert couldn’t write a coherent sentence. You’re the one who decided to offshore development to save money. Don’t be surprised when it’s a total flop.
  11. If you get ripped off, it’s not all your fault. Demand that someone who didn’t do their job make good. Don’t let mediocre work go. That just lowers the bar, worldwide. If US car manufacturers had followed this rule in the last 50 years, they’d still be on top.
  12. Internet marketing is not done in a vacuum. If weeks pass without a word from your agency, SEO team, or PPC folks, something’s wrong. They might be working hard. But somewhere about 3 days after your last meeting, they took a wrong turn. For the last 10 days, they’ve been helping you rank for “sarcastic rats” instead of “plastic mats”. You should probably check in.
  13. The latest thing is already dead, it just doesn’t know it yet. Chase it if you want, but when you catch it you’ll end up smelling vaguely… dead.
  14. People still buy what they want and reject what they don’t want. You’re a lot better off if you can provide the former.
  15. Make your password harder to guess than your last puppy’s name. Your password is your entire protection against the barbarian hordes. That one word can crush your entire career. Seriously.
  16. Companies that spend more than they earn generally have problems.
  17. Those who give guarantees are fools or liars. Unless they have a mind control device. Which would be pretty cool.
  18. Eventually, you have to stop researching, stop pondering, and do something.

Other stuff

Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/conversationmarketing/MRJI/~3/LHzMD61Eqw4/internet-marketing-random-thoughts-72011.htm

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